Mama Bears are the most incredible form of
human, and they deserve all the thanks we
1. Thank you for taking my phone away. Maybe it was a last resort punishment because you couldn’t get me to listen, but it fucking worked.
2. Thank you for picking me up when I got in trouble, and not yelling at me until the next morning.
3. Thank you for forgiving me when I screamed at you, and all those times I forgot to call.
4. Thank you for not giving me everything. Thank you for making me save my allowance to buy that ridiculously expensive toy I was obsessed with.
5. Thanks for lying about Santa, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny. And for making me believe in them for an inappropriately long amount of time.
6. Thank you for putting up with my obnoxious 13-year-old girl phase, and for letting me think that I was cool, even though I clearly was not.
7. Thank you for taking that picture of me, when I was incredibly awkward. That photo is pure gold.
8. Thanks for writing that note to my teacher, explaining why I didn’t do my homework – even if you did exaggerate a little bit. You saved my ass.
9. Thank you for giving me a really cute nickname that only you’re allowed to call me. And for having sweet inside jokes with me.
10. Thank you for holding a funeral for my pet. I still remember it, even after all these years.
11. Thanks for hating that boy with me. And for sharing the excruciating pain that my heart was feeling when he kissed that other girl.
12. Thank you for showing my boyfriend those baby pictures. I thought it was obnoxious of you at the time, but it was also incredibly sweet.
13. And thanks for not showing him anything from my fat phase. You knew which ones to hide and which to show.