To My Baby Up In Heaven

Today… today’s the day where I have my baby; my unborn baby removed from my body. A D&C is horrible.  I had the normal check in, the IV put in, wheel me away to the operating room and put me to sleep. Like it was all a dream. Woke up and went home. Literally like it was all a bad dream. You wake up from the worst thing that could happen to you.

I felt so much guilt and pain from all of that. And I felt that I did something wrong, that I ate something or did too much moving around that caused me to lose the baby. I never thought that I would’ve had to go through that. No one hope’s that they have a miscarriage and I would never wish upon anyone to have one. It was the worst day of my life. I can say that now, now that I’m 19 and have had some bad things happen in my life and that I can say this was my #1 worst day.

A few months go by and me and my boyfriend are at a friend house and this woman was here and her and I were talking and she asked me if I was pregnant or was pregnant and I said that I had a miscarriage in January, but we never knew what the baby was. She said “did u wanna know?” I said “we can’t, I wasnt far enough along to know” she said that I would’ve had a boy. She said she was a psychic medium and I believe her. She saw a blue folded blanket in front of me. When a blanket is folded that means that a baby passed away or is going to and if the blanket is open then that means I’m going to have a baby in the future. So she told me about the blue folded one, then she said she saw an open pink one, a folded pink one, and 2 open blue ones. So I would’ve had a boy, will have a girl in the future, lose a baby girl in the future and have 2 twin boys in the future.