Being a single mother is not easy, which sometimes can make dating not very easy too. You see, I spend so much time focusing on my child that I don’t have time for men who are not willing to accept these things.
1. My child comes first. This means that every single decision I make, I have to be sure that it is best for my child. Not just me, not you, not anybody else. If we schedule a date night and my child gets sick, I will be cancelling. If my child has an important event coming up, I will not blow that off to hang out with you instead.
2. I am not looking for a father for my child. And I have done this on my own for quite some time now, and believe me when I say that I’m not expecting some man to swoop in and play daddy. I got this covered.
3. You will not meet my child until I feel the time is right. Only if I feel like the relationship is going somewhere is when you will meet my child. So no, you cannot come over and hang out while I’m having movie night with my child. You cannot be around my baby at all until I decide it’s appropriate. I will not have men in and out of my child’s life, I refuse.
4. I don’t have time for games. I have someone that depends on me for stability and happiness. If you’re not looking for anything serious, don’t waste my time. If you want to lie and cheat and spend all your time at the club, go find someone who is interested in that lifestyle. As for me? I’ll pass.
5. I will not have a bad role model in my child’s life. Being a part of my life means eventually becoming a part of my child’s life, and I will not settle for anything less than a real man. One with goals and ambitions and dedication.
6. I am a mother first and a girlfriend second. This means that once things get serious and you do meet my child, you must be willing to be a part of the family dynamic. You must be willing to take trips to the park, play catch outside and watch silly cartoons. I do not push my child off on other people everyday so I can do whatever I want. I take being a mother very seriously and if you have absolutely no interest in my child when that time comes, I have no interest in you.
7. Being a single mother is not a weakness, it is my greatest strength. It means that I have become independent and know that I don’t need a man for anything. I am responsible and know how to get things done by any means. I am strong, and in the eyes of my child, I am a superhero. And most importantly, being a single mother means that I know how to love; fiercely, passionately and deeply, but this love does not always come easy. It must be earned.