Everyone has seen that show Teen Mom right? Is that show even still on?? I think I watched one episode… So for those of you who haven’t watched it, its about teenage girls that get pregnant and become moms. It’s a reality show, so they of course don’t show everything. And from my knowledge, most of those girls still got their parents help when they where pregnant and had the baby. It made teenage girls idolize these idiots that where making money off stupid decisions. So know you have 15 and 16 year olds running around with baby fever, dying to get pregnant. Lemme just take a minute and tell you what it’s really like to be pregnant at that age….
First off, have you ever thrown up at school? Had to pray to the porcelain goddess because of a stomach flu or Tuesday’s questionable meatloaf? And the whole time you’re there, you’re trying not to touch the rim or the bowl or the seat or anything because the seat was a little warm when you just lifted it, dear GOD what was the last person who was here doing?! Yeah imagine that happening for three months solid. Yes. You read that right. Three months. Not everyone has morning sickness for that long or at all, but I did. And only at school. So Monday through Friday at 7 a.m. when I walked in, I sat in the cafeteria for a max of about 30 minutes tops before I was wrapped around my high school’s toilet.
Second, let’s not forget actually having to tell people about it. Sometimes it’s a little bit better if you are still with the guy that knocked you up. But, in cases like mine, that doesn’t happen. So you have to explain why you aren’t together. Then you have to have the “are you going to keep it” talk. And about 80% of the time, when you are still in your first trimester, those people are asking if you are going to have an abortion. Then later, it’s asking if you are going to put it up for adoption. Talk about some awkward conversations…. And to go along with those awkward conversations are the awkward looks. And stares. They are looking at you like that to figure out if you are pregnant or not. Then, once they figure it out and realize how old you are, then the looks turn to pity.
You know that big belly that everyone thinks is so super cute? Yeah you have to lather in vitamin E and coconut lotion every day to keep from getting tiger stripes. Also known as stretch marks. And that’s fifteen to twenty pounds of extra weight you have to carry around. If you have luck like mine, you will have a class at one end of the school and your next class will be on the other end upstairs.
Now. Let’s talk about how your parents take the news of you expecting. The awkwardness just keeps getting better! Because I had just come off of a year long grounding. I was free for a summer. And then it was back to school and work only. Have you seen that movie Juno? There’s a line in there where she says “I’m already pregnant, so what other kind of shenanigans could I get into?” Probably my favorite line in the whole movie, just because of the word shenanigans. However, this line did not work on my parents… I was basically under house arrest. And as for the rest of my family, my grandma stopped talking to me. Completely. I went to her house everyday after school to get ready for my part time job. Do you know how awkward it is to have a family member completely ignore you even when you try to hug and kiss them goodbye? It’s not fun.
And the tears! Oh my gosh the tears!! You cry. All the time. All. The. Time. It’s very annoying. At this point, I was a senior in high school. So I was constantly fighting back tears in class. (Thank you, hormones.) Throw those bad boys on top anxiety and depression and you’ve got a helluva combo there… I mean some one breathes at you wrong and you’re bawling.
Those teachers that you absolutely love? Yeah they aren’t going to go easier on you because you missed a test for your ultrasound. They are going to tell you to work on your scheduling issues. Because you made the decision to have sex, not them. Yeah, it may have been an accident, but it doesn’t get you out of tests and homework and class projects. If anything, it gets you bumped out of your AP English class that challenges you’re writing skills on a daily basis, to a regular English class where you sit there and doodle on the edge of your vocab notes for words that you learned three years ago. Lastly. You know who bought my first car? I did. For six hundred dollars cash. You know who moved out at 18? I did. You know who bought all my groceries? I did. You know who made sure both myself and my kid ate, bathed, slept, got up in time for school and work? I did. Mommy and daddy weren’t there to make sure all that stuff happened. Sure some parents let their kids stay at home and help them out a lot after their kids have kids. Mine, did not. Doesn’t mean my parents love me any less, they just wanted me to learn how to be an adult. Because I had made the adult decision to have sex. So girls, think about that next time you think you want a baby. You say you can handle the sleepless nights, poopy diapers, nothing ever fitting right again. Well, think about what comes before all that. And add high school to it.