A daughter is a mothers gender partner, her closest ally in the family confederacy, an extension of herself. And mothers are their daughter’s role model, their biological and emotional road map, the arbiter of all of their relationships” – Victoria Secunda
And we have lost that.
We have officially begun on a path of a new life, one without a role model who seemed to have a road map to follow.
There are people all around us, but in a way, we are still so very alone.
With everything life throws at us, as daughters, we search for our mothers. We search for guidance from our mothers. We search for answers from our mothers. We search for help from our mothers. There is nothing in life our mom didn’t have the answer to.
She always knew the right thing to say. She always knew how to get our heads on straight with whatever we were dealing with.
Nobody in this world can fill the void that opened when we lost our mothers.
So few people understand the loss that we are dealing with. As a daughter, unless you have already lost your mother, you have no idea. It’s a feeling no one could ever try to explain unless they’ve been through it.
It’s the feeling when you just got your heart broken and you can’t lay in your mom’s arms.
It’s the feeling when you just got a new job and can’t call your mom on the way home to tell her.
It’s the feeling when you are so excited, but realize you can’t share it with your mom.
It’s the feeling when you have no idea what to wear on a first date, and you know your mom would have the perfect outfit in mind.
It’s the feeling when you are in a fight with your significant other. And want to ask your mom how she would handle it.
And for the first, and every single milestone after, that your mom isn’t there for.
It’s the feeling when you’re fighting with your girlfriends. And just want to hear your mom’s opinion.
And when you cannot figure out what shoes to wear with your dress and your mom isn’t there to help you.
It’s the feeling of constantly missing your biggest fan, your best friend, your person.
It’s the feeling for the rest of your life, that becomes all too familiar.
It’s a feeling of awful pain, that no matter how good things in your life are going… will always linger.
It’s a club that we did not ask to join.
We are motherless daughters.