It’s one of those nights. The nights when I wake up at 3 AM and I think about you.
I think about finding out I was pregnant with you and how scared I was.
I think about about when I heard your heartbeat for the first time and my heart doubled in size because I was in utterly in love.
I think about the pain and hardships I went through with your father while you grew inside of me. All wanted him to do was to be as invested in you as I was.
I remember being so scared walking into the operating room.
I remember feeling the tugging as they pulled you out of my stomach and the relief I felt when I saw you and heard that cry.
You completely changed me. From the moment I saw those two pink lines I was changed.
You were truly my first love. You taught me to love. You taught me patience.
Sometimes I take you for granted. Some days I spend more time looking at my phone than looking at you. I know I can be a better mother and a better person.
Everyday I wake up with intention to do better. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. But my love for you always grows more and more.