Nope I’m not a mom by birth right. Nope I didn’t adopt either. I did what I needed to do to take care of a child when it wasn’t my responsibility. I was 13 when she was born. There was one night it was just her and I. She was about 2 or 3 months old and I was working on English homework. She started to cry. I picked up my English book, and her and went to the kitchen. I made a bottle and while it warmed up I bounced her in the kitchen, and I read to her.
Since that day we have had the best bond ever. And I have done everything I could to protect and care for her. This is what I have learned as the big sister that became more of the mother figure:
You can love someone more than yourself: I have never cared about someone more in my life. I would do anything for her to make sure that she is happy and healthy and living her best life. Even if that means I’m not living my best life because that smile is my whole heart!
Even the hard days are good days: life can be so crazy. School work taking care of a kiddo who is always looking up to you. Some days you just wanna quit but then they come up to you with a smile and a hug and tell you that you are their super hero. This comes after they have destroyed the house but you stop looking at that and you feel all your love walking around right there in front of you and you dig a little deeper and make it all happen.
Taking care of kids isn’t for the faint heated. It’s a full time everyday all day job. There are no breaks. And so I learned to be responsible because she needed me to be. Dinner had to be on the table and she needed to be up and ready for school. So did I, so i just did it!
Keep the hustle
Taking care of a kid means that you have to keep up on bills and make sure there is food in the house. So yes I work two jobs and I go to school because if it’s the last thing I do our life is going to be great!
My free time is for her: no, sorry I don’t want to go out. I wanna pop some pop corn build a tent and watch Disney princesses with my baby sister.
Discipline is hard
Watching her fall on the ground in an tantrum because she can’t do something breaks my heart, but I know this is going to make her a better person one day.
Conversation are hard
We have had some tough ones, but everyone of them bring us closer. Yes, mom loves you but sometimes you are better off being with me. I’ll always protect you baby girl. You will always have me no matter what!
The worry: oh the worry, is she okay when shes not with me. Is mom going to take her? When will I see her again? Is she doing her school work? Did she even go to school the other day? Wonder what she eating? Is she going to forget that I love her?
Loving her hurts
No it’s not easy for me to promote a relationship with my mom and her. I’m scared she’ll get hurt but I have to because it’s better then her watching us fight. Many time I look at her and I see my whole heart walking around outside of me. I hurt just looking at her.
I’m so proud
Yes, I’m that person in the front row cheering every move she makes one. She’s an amazing little girl and I could not be prouder. She has a kind heart and the purest soul.
Loving this little girl for the last 11 years has been the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I have learned so much by taking on this role in her life. I would never change it! I’m blessed to have this wonderful bond!