Mama Bears are the most incredible form of human, and they deserve all the thanks we can give.
1. Thank you for taking my phone away. Maybe it was a last resort punishment because you couldn’t get me to listen, but it fucking worked.
2. Thank you for picking me up when I got in trouble, and not yelling at me until the next morning.
3. Thank you for forgiving me when I screamed at you, and all those times I forgot to call.
4. Thank you for not giving me everything. Thank you for making me save my allowance to buy that ridiculously expensive toy I was obsessed with.
5. Thanks for lying about Santa, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny. And for making me believe in them for an inappropriately long amount of time.
6. Thank you for putting up with my obnoxious 13-year-old girl phase, and for letting me think that I was cool, even though I clearly was not.
7. Thank you for taking that picture of me, when I was incredibly awkward. That photo is pure gold.
8. Thanks for writing that note to my teacher, explaining why I didn’t do my homework - even if you did exaggerate a little bit. You saved my ass.
9. Thank you for giving me a really cute nickname that only you're allowed to call me. And for having sweet inside jokes with me.
10. Thank you for holding a funeral for my pet. I still remember it, even after all these years.
11. Thanks for hating that boy with me. And for sharing the excruciating pain that my heart was feeling when he kissed that other girl.
12. Thank you for showing my boyfriend those baby pictures. I thought it was obnoxious of you at the time, but it was also incredibly sweet.
13. And thanks for not showing him anything from my fat phase. You knew which ones to hide and which to show.
14. Thank you for pretending to like my awful ex-boyfriend. You knew he wasn’t the one before I did, but you kept your mouth shut and let me figure that out for myself.
15. Thank you for bringing me on spa days. Maybe it was unnecessary for me to get my nails done, but going with you always made me feel like a movie star.
16. Thank you for paying for me, even when I said I'd cover it. And for always saying, “Sweetie, save your money.”
17. Thanks for going on a candy binge with me, and for blaming the dog when Dad asked where all the sweets went.
18. Thank you for learning how to text, even though you probably took secret classes with Apple; it means a lot that you wanted to get on my level.
19. Thank you for reading all the idiotic tabloids I loved, so that we had something to talk about.
20. Thanks for not letting me see you cry, even when I knew that you did. You definitely kept up your Super Woman image.
21. Thank you for getting drunk with me. The fact that we can drink wine and talk about sex proves you're the coolest mom ever.
22. Thank you for saying fuck now and then. It makes me laugh literally every single time.
23. Thank you for sticking up for me. And for being on my side even when I was wrong.
24. Thanks for being my biggest cheerleader, and sometimes my only cheerleader.
25. Thank you for being everything I needed. I know it must've been difficult to be the strict one, the fun one, the rock, and so much more all at once, but you made it look like a breeze.
26. Thanks for being you. And for wanting me to be a better version of yourself, even though all I really want is to be just like you when I grow up.