Today is national coming out day. A moment for many that is a beginning of freedom.
I look back on this time in our lives and I always have mixed feelings about this day. As your mother, I often have thoughts of “I wish the world was different.” “I wish I didn’t have to live in fear for you.”
Today, you sat me down in our kitchen with tears in your eyes. You kept apologizing to me barely able to get the words out in-between sobs. Once the words finally tumbled out of your mouth “I’m gay” you could not look at me.
Suddenly Embarrassed myself in the back of my mind, I thought “Where did I go wrong that my child is ashamed to tell me who they are?” Haven’t I taught them to be proud of themselves? Always told them they could do anything they set their minds too?
Before I gave those thoughts life and I let you hear all my insecurities about my parenting skills I just hugged you instead.
Oh, my sweet child my greatest wish for you in life has always been for you to have the confidence in yourself to stand tall and love yourself for who you are.
As your mother, I worry about you getting sick, getting into a car crash or how you will handle your first heartbreak.
It will never ever shame me to meet a person you decide to bring home man or woman.
It doesn’t matter because whoever they are will have to pass my high standards I’ll have for any person trying to win my baby’s heart.
I hate that we live in a society that will try and judge. They worry more about the lives of others that have never hurt anyone as opposed to worrying about themselves.
If, I could strike down every soul that would wish you harm trust me I would.
A mother’s love knows no bounds. You are my greatest gift in life given to me. You have taught me to become more open in my heart and my mind.
Any fire you should have to walk through I’ll always be by your side and your safe place to come too.
Mom who always knew.
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